after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
Okay good. And who the fuck put a condom on my foot. That shit hurt
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize
