bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
This girl I work with, who is 18 btw, invited me to her baby shower. Do they sell abortions in gift certificate form?
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes
she wants to wait til the kids are asleep so im just shotgunning the parents beers in the pillow fort. I love fucking babysitters
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
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