So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
