Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
She's officially a Tinder poltergeist.
You said too many real things and now I need to crawl back inside my protective fort of sarcasm, being an asshole, and sass
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
Randomize
