You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
I woke up on my floor...
I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop...
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
there is nothing more depressing than your birth control alarm going off while you're masturbating, and realizing you've been taking pointless precautions for over a month now.
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
Randomize
