I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
I dont know who to turn my two weeks notice into so I'm just going to get hammered at work and see who fires me.
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
Randomize
