Note to self. Condoms are not microwavable.
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
I need to sanitize my soul.
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
Randomize
