Responsibility does not care about your dick.
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
As punishment for throwing up on my car, I am holding your phone hostage until the morning. You can read this message after I drop it off.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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