actually, I'm a sock model
I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
In the past year, I've fucked 3 Dave's and you've fucked 2 Dave's. That's a lot of Dave's in our vaginas.
We need to start a soap opera called the Dave's of Our Lives.
Randomize
