So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
Attempting to teach the cat how to shake. I need a job.
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
there are 5 pictures on my phone from last night, 4 are too blurry to recognize and the 5th is you dangling a twizzler over your mouth, naked.
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Randomize
