Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
i can't put facebook on my resume under hobbies.
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
Slept with a member of the band last night, found out today after extensive stalking he’s engaged. Pro tip: don’t research one night stands.
Randomize
