Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
Also, since I switched back to this phone I've found a crop of dick pics and your funeral arrangements.
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
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