Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
so this guy on craigslist is offering a case of beer to shave his back. i think i'm gonna take him up on it.
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
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