i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
Come over. I'll eat you out and we'll make bacon.
best text I've received ever.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
I found half a candy bar in my bra today... Melted to my nipple. What a mess. It was still good though.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize