I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
Good afternoon everyone! Just texting to inform you that Andrew, your emotionally detached man-whore, will be back starting this weekend. Please RSVP.
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
I found my spirit animal in the shower. It's a sloth/bear that lives in my chest.
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
Randomize
