And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
Randomize
