God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
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