Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
I'm so hungover that I just wrote up my will because I'm afraid I'm gonna die. I'm leaving you my bong.
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
Those nachos came to me in a dream
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
