You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
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