Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
I get a nice feeling when i open my fridge and see it filled with thirty beers and half a leftover jimmy johns pickle.
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
In case you're wondering what eggs stolen from an elementary school's chicken coop taste like, delicious. Delicious is what they taste like.
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
soo... how was my night?
Let the clothes fall where they may.
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
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