I accidently shit my pants. So I tried to throw my underwear in their lake, but they floated. So in the middle of the night, I got into the paddle boat and had to throw a rock on top of them so they would sink. Next time, I just won't shit myself.
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
I'm off the liquor
You're forefathers are ashamed of you. They didn't struggle to make it to America so that you could become a soft dick
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
