He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
Executive order 941: BRING ME THE FINEST PANCAKES!
You have got to stop watching the West Wing before going out.
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
