sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
I found a lucrative side business - giving rides home to drunk oil executives. Very profitable.
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
Your babysitter texted, wants me to pay with weed. I don't know where to get any & don't want to. Will she take cigarettes instead? Or um, cash? Like a person?
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
Verdict: uncircumcised.
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
Randomize