I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
Just convinced airport security that im sober. All i do is win.
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
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