Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
i just fingered the ice cream at home instead of getting a spoon
been there done that
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
Never in my life did I dream that I would meet and NFL linesman, let alone that he would be standing before me dressed as a Roman centurion and asking for Vaseline.
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
Randomize
