plz talk dirty to me
Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
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