I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
Dude you just tried to have a one night stand with my ex girlfriend while we were trying to put you to bed upstairs.
but that still doesn't explain how i woke up on the couch down stairs.
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
I just changed all my morning alarms to wake me up with different Jesse McCartney songs telling me I'm beautiful. Would you believe I'll be 25 this year?
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
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