just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
and now that ive poetically compared your vagina to a nuclear missile, I hope youre prepared for this date.
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
Randomize
