I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
then they caught me trying to hide the turtle in the fridge
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
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