just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
Randomize
