Me too!
One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
I'm giving you an age limit on the people you're allowed to hit on at steak n shake at 3 am. I can't see straight and I want a cheeseburger. You want dick. I'm sure we can't order at least one of those. But maybe.
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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