sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
Why are all the lights on in my house? Every single one. Someone should turn them off but I'm the only one here and I'm sure as hell not doin it.
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
I JUST HAD PHONE SEX. WHILE TAKING A BATH. FOR AN HOUR. EATING A PLATE OF BURRITOS. TOP THAT SHIT.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
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