Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
woke up with a sweatshirt on that said "someone special calls me grandma" and a sword. i'm just going to assume that it was a good night
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
she hid the dish soap because she was afraid someone would confuse it with the margaritas and drink it instead. her reasoning was "theyre both soo pink...i cant tell them apart"
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
Just had the moment before I realised I'd packed you off in an ambulance last night after funnel-feeding you Monster and vodka. Your mom thinks I'm a dick doesn't she?
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
Ladies don't puke and tell
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
Randomize
