why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
He threw a goldfish cracker into my toilet and then proceeded to laugh for 32 minutes. I timed it.
How could you not be happy? Its like "and then I found 5 dollars" but "and then I found a handle of vodka"
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Randomize
