I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
I went golfing for the first time today!! Aren't you proud?
Driving a golf cart around all day with a keg attatched to the back doesn't exactly count as golfing
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
I feel like a drive thru vagina
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
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