: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
Who are you, and why are you in my phone as Elf on the Shelf
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize
