i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
You were so drunk, you called my cruise control, the "auto pilot" and asked my car politely to take us to Taco Bell.
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
If you think hives from an allergic reaction to lube is funny, remind me to tell you the story about how I got a black eye from masturbating.
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
Randomize
