its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
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