There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
nothing says "you're fucked" like watching a movie with the family and a handle of vodka comes crashing down from your hiding spot in the ceiling tiles.
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
I mean.. listen to "Put It In My Mouth" and you'll get the gist of my voicemail for you.
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
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