new low, i just stole money from my 5 year old sister to buy condoms
...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
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