Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
Emergency nipple ring removal:vodka, tweezers, and vodka. Can you bring me a band-aid?
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
