Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
How was your Memorial Day?
Don't remember... but I do have an American flag painted on my boob signed by a Staff Sargent... Oh God, I hope that's his military rank and not a nick name.
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
Randomize
