You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
I made people serenade her before talking to her and went on a condom run. If I'm going to be in the friend zone, I'm going to be its fucking king.
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
I COULD CUT A FUCKING DIAMOND WITH MY RIGHT NIPPLE RIGHT NOW HOLY FUCK
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
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