I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
Today I'm judging my level of singleness on a scale of one to eat-a-can-of-frosting. It's not looking good for me.
Ooooh. Get funfetti
Well, I made it all the way to the gas station. And from there, I begged a cab driver who was parked outside, to give me a piggy back ride the final 2 blocks to my apartment. I wasn't in the cab. Didn't have to pay. Drunk me is smart, and very lazy.
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
Randomize
