Could a canary swim?
Last time I ever let you pet sit.
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
Beautiful wedding. Beautiful bride. I got shitfaced. Came home and ate two corndogs. I'm still single.
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
Randomize