God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
Oh, btw, UPS might come by. Drunk me ordered us $75 worth of gummy airhead starburst type candies. Whatever it is, it'll be delicious.
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
In what world does 'I'm awake' at 2:30 in the morning on a wednesday translate to 'let's fuck' in the span of one text? Where has the romance gone?
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
Randomize
