In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
I asked you if you wanted to go to the ER, have me sew it up or just wrap it in duct tape and keep on keepin on. You just said YES. I remember very little after that.
You're a good friend.
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
Randomize