You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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