Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
he just asked me to email him a handle of captain morgans...how sober do you think he is?
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
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