am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
I'm so tired of dating women who lie about their age. You show up feeling like you need to follow them around with a dust pan and a broom.
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
Yeah I should probably start planning our first conversation instead of our first child.
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
Randomize
