Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
Great. My funeral dress now smells of smoke and disappointing sex.
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
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